Friday, October 20, 2006


Karma again.

Didn't I say someone would get sick? Probaby not exactly what I was talking about, but after a day of resolutions and yee-ha exercising, I woke up yesterday morning with a migraine-y kind of headache. [I hesitate to call it a full blown migraine as I don't suffer like real migraine sufferers do, but I get the nausea bit, which is not conducive to being at all 'with it' or capable of doing anything constructive.]

So I basically did nothing much all day. Took tablets that didnt' really work. Marc said he'd pick up what I was going to go to town for.. so I took myself off to bed. Dozed for a bit, though a storm was coming in (unusually in the middle of the day) and I was always aware of this grumbling sound, and then a short, light shower of rain while I pondered the few things I had hanging on the clothesline.)

I would feel better, then get up to do something, then feel crap again, so I'd sit back down, drink tea, and try to think myself better.. mostly to no avail.

Got Zoe to ballet after school... and when I picked her up, I made it to the local supermarket to pick up a few things.. and managed to make tuna pie for dinner. (An old recipe I used to do to death when I first moved out of home. Noone likes it that much.. but I do because of the yummy cheese biscuit base. Zoe picked out the capsicum (but then ate it when I asked her to - she tries so hard to be good!). Caitlin picked out the tuna!! and didn't eat it when I asked her to. (She doesn't try at all to be good.) Alison as always is a gem when it comes to eating. She's our eating machine. Marc's not that keen on tinned fish, but he eats what he's given at least.

And then all hell broke loose with the Diva. Some 'straw breaking the camel's back' incident (over her not putting dirty clothes in the wash), and both Marc and I cracked. Banned her from the computer, because it's her obsession with it that has pushed things over the edge.

Being the child/teenager she is (she has ADD - Attitudinal Defiance Disorder - I reckon.) she cracked back... and it was on.

Let's just say that it is as if she's read all the books about how to be a defiant little b****; and we've obviously been studying up on How to Do Everything Wrong as the Parent of a Teenager.

When you deliver "consequences".. punishment.. whatever you want to call it, you basically don't expect that she will return fire. Basically, you expect her to put up and shut up. Not this one. Hauls out the artillery, and it's retaliation time.. guns blazing. Her ammunition usually includes:

Having a reasonable discussion with her is not an option. Think the Brady Bunch style chats where Mum or Dad sit on the end of the bed and it all gets sorted out? Not that. Doesn't happen here. [It can and does with the other two, but has NEVER worked with her.... and I don't have a clue what I've done wrong or different with her....]

Marc did manage to talk for a little while this morning with her, before voices got raised again. He pointed out that both 'sides' needed to be more reasonable. That we would try to be more 'reasonable' about some things that we had cracked about, but that she had to realise the things she wasn't being 'reasonable' about.

It would have been nice if she had been more reasonable in terms of being 'involved' in her sister's birthday this morning. As I predicted, Alison went in to her to see if she wanted to be involved in getting up and giving Zoe the CD they'd talked about them giving her and got the response "No. Piss off." Nice. Later, Zoe got a terse "Happy Birthday". And that was it.

Lucky Zoe was able to ride through that sort of crap, and enjoy the limelight with the rest of the family. Our alarm went off around 7.00 but I'd sort of been awake, half expecting her to land on our bed reminding us about what day it was. All quiet.. so I started singing "Happy Birthday to you... happy birthday to youuuu"... and surprise, surprise, she was up the stairs in a flash.

Seemed happy with her pressies. A bedside light that will clamp on her bed. A big heart shaped, pink, fluffy cushion. Two (pink) bags.. one small for shopping (to fit her purse) and a slightly bigger one that she can fit STUFF in when we go on car trips, etc. A cd wallet that has a pocket for the CD walkman. A fluffy rug. And some notebooks and hair clips.

She seemed happy.

This morning I've made cupcakes and taken them up to school with candles and paper towels. (The teacher loves me because she doesn't have to cut any cake up.)

This morning I've also spent a while on quotations for home contents cover that will cover our bikes - here and away.

And I need to get up and get some stuff packed for leaving tomorrow. Still have swimming lessons this afternoon... and need to buy sausages (for BBQ birthday dinner).

Despite feeling like crap yesterday, I did manage to wash up everything after dinner. (My concession to FlyLady's polished sink mania is actually achieving the washing up of all the cooking stuff - all the time - that would be a BIG CHANGE in the right direction.)

I don't feel 100% terrific today, but there's no use complaining. Hopefully the HLEE's will fix me up after my swimming class this afternoon.

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"ADD - Attitudinal Defiance Disorder "-- good one!!

Happy Birthday Zoe!!!!
Happy Birthday Zoe!

As for the "other one", don't ask what you've done differently, think nature not nurture. She sure sounds a handful. *hugs*
There is no such thing as a reasonable discussion with any determined child between 13 and 21.

Try driving her nuts by not responding to her but but but's when you have said your piece or delivered the conseqence.

I will admit Paul was better at it than me.

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